Position – Striker
DOB – 3/3/1978
Debut v Unknown Opponents – Oct 1999
Nicknames – Useless

Living in crime-ridden South London these days, Steve’s appearances are somewhat limited, but he still shows considerable prowess around goal when playing, and grabbed the vital goal to send the B team into the main Worldnet draw for the first time in 2007. Steve is another of the musically minded members of the squad, and his tastes in this respect cannot really be faulted, despite his bizarre love of Nylon Pylon and Coin-Op. He is another who appeared in the 2002 IFA Cup final, played in Gibbsy’s testimonial later that year, and also had the honour of being the first manager of the Vets team at Worldnet 2010.

Steve’s Q and A

Describe yourself in a sentence
A reflexive form of you (used as the direct or indirect object of a verb of the object of a preposition)

What was the first WFC game you went to and what can you remember about it?
I have absolutely no idea. I would have been about 6 or 7 at the time and went regularly enough that they all kind of blend into one. The first match I know for sure I was at was the 4-4 draw against Walsall FA Cup replay in February 1987.

Finest ever WFC memory
It has to be the play off final in 1999 although it’s run close by the pre-season tour to Italy under Vialli or being in the front row of the Vicarage Road end when Craig Ramage scored and ran over to give me a big sweaty hug.

Worst away trip and why
As a general rule, there are few places more depressing than the away stand at Selhurst park. But for a specific match, getting frostbite while losing 5-0 to Fulham takes some beating.

WIFC playing highlight
Ask me in a year’s time, the best is yet to come.

Favourite WIFC moment
Playing at Vicarage Road v the Watford legends before the Nigel Gibbs testimonial game. Watching the video back afterwards however was painful. I thought it was stuck on 0.5x speed.

All time favourite WFC player
Tommy Mooney

All time favourite Watford XI
Kevin Miller, Nigel Gibbs, Keith Millen, Robert Page, Paul Robinson, Gary Porter, Steve Palmer, Craig Ramage, John Barnes, Tommy Mooney, Heidar Helguson

Red shorts or black?
I prefer black but we’ve always done better with red. So basically, I don’t really care.

Which actor would play you in ‘WIFC – The Movie’
Jason Segal

Position – Centre Midfield
DOB – 21/8/1969
Debut v QPR – May 1997
Nicknames – Mowen, Eunuch, Part-timer who thinks he’s God

Another of the stalwarts, Mowen has been around since time began, but looks no older than the day he joined as his baby faced looks nicely wallpaper over the cracks of his advancing years. Blessed with a knack of looking retarded in every picture (see above and below..) old-timer Mowen was inducted to the WIFC Hall of fame in 2004, and had the honour of scoring WIFC’s only goal in the Gibbsy Testimonial match at the Vic in 2002, a free-kick blasted past Steve Sherwood. Time waits for no man, even Mowen, and he underwent surgery on a long-term achilles injury in 2011. Unfortunately, it was a success and Mowen made a comeback during 2012/13 at Chorley. He got buckled after 15 minutes..

Mowen’s Q and A

Describe yourself in a sentence:

A god amongst men

What was the first WFC game you went to and what can you remember about it?

Fincham answers these kind of shit questions, I’ll pass.

Finest ever WFC memory

Alan Smart’s winner in the play off final

Worst away trip and why

Liverpool 1987, lost 4-0, car broke down and got back at some ridiculous time in the morning

WIFC playing highlight

Probably don’t need to answer that

Favourite WIFC moment

URN

All-time favourite Watford player

Ricky Holden

All-time favourite Watford XI (not the best players – your favourites)

Again another dull question I’ll leave for Fincham. Just to add though shovel shoes wouldn’t make it.

Red shorts or black?

Black

Which actor would play you in ‘WIFC – The Movie’

Brad Pitt obviously. another god

Position – Right Midfield
DOB – 29/10/1979
Debut v Kilmarnock – Jun 2003
Nicknames – Murph, Dead Pan

Craig Ramage-alike Richard has firmly established himself as WIFC’s resident oddball since joining during the player recruitment drive in 2003. The Step-over enthusiast used to own the much missed and sadly departed Hot Rod, or badly battered Volvo to you and I, and has produced many memorable displays of wing wizadry. None more so than home to West Ham in 2008, as Murph beat his own club record when he passed up a whopping 284 opportunities to pass or cross in favour of another lollipop. Murph is now the club’s leading appearance maker and became the first player to appear 300 times for the club.

Murph’s Q and A

Describe yourself in a sentence
A bumbling oaf wrapped up in a cauliflower of nonsense with a poor first touch. 

What was the first WFC game you went to and what can you remember about it?
Away to Arsenal in 1987 FA Cup Quarter Final. Remember being annoyed when the man next to me knocked my packet of iced gems out of my hand after John Barnes scored a goal.

Finest ever WFC memory
4.53pm, 31st May 1999, Wembley Stadium.

Worst away trip and why
To the former home of Wigan Athletic, Springfield Park, in the 97/98 season. A ground as enticing as Susan Boyle’s undercarriage. Had to stand on a roofless, derelict terrace whilst it pissed down for the whole of the 1st half and we went 3-0 down. In the 2nd half we got it back to 3-2 and equalised in the last minute only for it to be ruled out. But it was after the game that things took a turn for the worse. I stopped off in the toilets where I was set upon by a teenage boy who touched me inappropriately on the bottom, verbally mocked me and then stole my limited edition Spice Girls’ backpack. Horrific. Years later I would come to know that boy as none other than Richard Wenham.

WIFC playing highlight
Preston away – nutmegged myself three times in a row before executing a quadruple stepover in super slow-motion. All done with an imaginary ball whilst Preston were scoring down the other end of the pitch.

Favourite WIFC moment
Making Nev Hardman cry on our run to the 2008 Worldnet final.

All-time favourite Watford player
Craig Godfrey Ramage

All-time favourite Watford XI (the best players = your favourites)
(1-1-8 formation) No keeper – no need, Colin Foster, Craig Ramage, Stuart Slater, Rod Thomas, Nordin Wooter, Tony Daley, Rick Holden, John Barnes, Anthony McNamee, Ashley Young, Gary Penrice 

Red shorts or black?
One half red, one half black.

Which actor would play you in ‘WIFC – The Movie’
Pam St Clement

Position – Striker
DOB – 31/8/1979
Debut v Portsmouth – 2001
Nicknames – Leo Sayer, Lino

Speedy and big-nosed Soloway has proved to be a hugely versatile player for the club since his debut in 2001, appearing with distinction up front, in central midfield and on the wing. Dave’s sometimes straggly hair and uncanny ability to look like several famous people at once unsettles many an opponent, but let us not forget he is also a linesman beyond compare. Now one of the senior players, Dave is 3rd in the all-time scorers list, despite his penchant for hideous misses, and has also shown an eye for the big occasion, as he starred in the A team’s run to the Quarter Finals at Worldnet 2011, and scored a second half equaliser in the 2012 London Cup Final

Dave’s Q and A

Describe yourself in a sentence

Average skill, average pace, average talent, average size nose

What was the first WFC game you went to and what can you remember about it?

October 1990 – Watford vs Middlesbrough – I remember standing on the old Rookery terrace and struggling to see what was going on at the far end of the pitch – we lost 3-0!

Finest ever WFC memory

The 1999 Play-off final – Having queued overnight outside the Vic for a ticket I’m not sure I’ve ever anticipated a game as much

Worst away trip and why

Hull.  The game(s) in 2008 are a close second but I also went there for a pre-season friendly in the late 90’s (??) that finished 0-0 and I seem to recall being particularly abysmal

WIFC playing highlight

I enjoy the vast majority of our games, away matches especially but a personal highlight is the funbus trip to play away at Sheffield United.  I was captain for the game, scored twice from central midfield in a 3-1 win against a good team and would say that it has been my best all-round performance for the team

Favourite WIFC moment

Watching Bally getting lobbed on his line, over and over again

All-time favourite Watford player

Darren Bazeley, obviously

All-time favourite Watford XI (not the best players – your favourites)

Kevin Miller, Keith Dublin, Colin Foster, Jay DeMerit, Nigel Gibbs, Adam Johnson, Craig Ramage, Ronny Rosenthal, Darren Bazeley, Devon White, Kevin Philipps

Red shorts or black?

Don’t care

Which actor would play you in ‘WIFC – The Movie’

Grant Heslov

Position – Left Midfield
DOB – 15/9/1987
Apps – 220
Goals – 71
Debut v West Ham – Oct 2005
Worldnets – 8
Nicknames – Moods, Mrs Pricko

Winger and talc enthusiast Joel was recruited in 2005, having been spotted playing against WIFC for the Glory Horns team. Joel quickly became a key player and went on to break Matt Wells’ dominance of the most improved player award in 2006. He is also blessed with a turn of speed, a few Murph-esque tricks and a growing collection of great goals for his scrapbook, including a great run and finish against Nigel Gibbs’ Watford Legends in 2009. In 2011/12, Joel completed a unique treble, as he crowned a season in which he was top appearance maker and top scorer by winning the Player of the Year award, too.

Joel’s Q and A

Describe yourself in a sentence
Skinny Pixie-like wing wizard with a penchant for his team-mates’ daughters/sisters. Lock ’em up quick!

What was the first WFC game you went to and what can you remember about it?
April ’97 at home to Crewe Alexandra. We lost 2-1. All I remember is asking my dad why someone kept shouting and swearing at the players. In hindsight, it was probably one of you mugs!

Finest ever WFC memory
Watching Allan Smart grab Watford’s second at Wembley and bursting into tears. Awesome.

Worst away trip and why
Hull away. Enough said.

WIFC playing highlight
Skinning Nigel Gibbs and Andy Hessenthaler to score past Rich Walker when we played a bunch of Watford Legends at the Met.

Favourite WIFC moment
Talcing the f*** out of Daz

All-time favourite Watford player
Leigh Harrington

All-time favourite Watford XI (not the best players – your favourites)
Alec Chamberlain; Paul Robinson , Steve Palmer, Clarke Carlisle, Darren Bazeley; Nordin Wooter, Allan Nielsen, Micah Hyde, Ashley Young; Michel Ngonge, Heidar Helguson

Red shorts or black?
Red

Which actor would play you in ‘WIFC – The Movie’
Russell Brand